..Wigan Dialect

A Collection of Lancashire Dialect Poems, Photographs, Phrases & Sayings from around the Wigan area. By Jeff Unsworth

Jeffrey's Catty

( To read the translation of this poem click here )

Jeffrey's Catty

Aah'm beawn't mek a catty this afty.
When aah get wom fer skoo.
Lastics brock'n on't thowd un.
Un av not gett'n much else fot do.

Aah'v sin a belt'in two leg.
On a tree in Leylund park.
Aah'm goo'int go deawn thee'r at orf past six
As soon as it's gett'n dark.

Mi dad se's av not fot aah one.
Cos aah kil't a sparrow.
Burr he'l not know thar av geet it.
Cos aas't hide it under't barrow.

Aahm bestist shot in Higher Ince, me.
Aah con hit a con at thir'ty yard.
Aah con hit a gas leet at fifty foot.
Un't th'arse er't next doo'ers cat is not so hard.

When aah'v geet mi two leg.
Un two foot of square lastic.
Aah'm beawnt cut tung eaw't of mi shoe.
Cos things, they get that drastic.

Yo see, Aah need a leather pouch.
Un there's no wee'r else fot go.
So aa'st at keep hid'in both mi shoes.
Then mi dad u'll neyer know.

So neaw av geet mi two leg.
Some lastic un tung eawt of mi shoe.
Neaw I need some cott'n.
Any colour u'll do.

Aah'l nick some eawt mi mothers tin.
There's no way of her know'in.
Un if her thinks there's not much left.
Her'l think her's used it sew'in.

Aw't th'ingreediunt neaw av geet.
Aah'm ready fot drive folk batty.
So folk,waa'tch eawt cos Jeffreys here.
Un Jeffreys geet a catty.